Monday, July 19, 2010

1998 - End of the Beginning

By the end of February 1998, my life radically changed.

I had to move out of my bedroom on account of it flooding. Adding to that, I struggled to recall dreams for weeks in both February and January. Looking back, I grew steadily more resistant to cues from the Nova Dreamer. I had to raise the alarm settings, and eventually, I slept through maximum.

I never deliberately performed a W.I.L.D. I made the mistake of wearing the mask to bed, instead of using the mask after 6-hours sleep. After building up a tolerance, this was especially counterproductive.

The remaining dream reports to be published to this blog were conducted a full 12-months later. Sadly, progress and special dreams I had between February 1998, and January 1999, are now only memories.

Dream 072-074: Three Monster Dreams

072: I was with a companion trying to get some creature to come out from behind barrels and crates using grenade like bombs that I was lobbing.

We were taking it all pretty lightly when from behind a barrel lurched a muscular undead looking dog. It headed straight for me. I was so startled by its sudden appearance that I woke up.

073: This was an action-nightmare. Long and vivid, and only partially recalled. I was with Lia and others try to survive an ongoing struggle with a 10ft winged, skinless humanoid that was out to kill. I had a gun, and baseball bat.

There were a few zombies around. A lot of terror, and white lockers. I remember at one point the creature peered through a vent at me. And that it killed a few people in an industrial looking complex in neighboring rooms to mine.

074: It was a pleasant afternoon in the suburbs and I was looking out a window. I saw a huge monster standing up, blocking out the sun. I ran and hid in a closet, that was also very large.

-February 27, 1998

Friday, July 16, 2010

Dream 069-071: Future Problems

069: I was in my childhood bedroom. My cousin David was in there and a new bed. David was younger than me, and short. I told him I was stronger than him. He looked disgusted. We may have wrestled each other a little after that.

070: I was in a big futuristic city. I had to walk through some ugly rundown areas that took me past large open sewer entrances. A guy (worker?) told me there were "too many" rats in the sewer. The solution he had in mind was to put "more eels" in the water.

071: Joe, Steff, and Eric were in a room with some kind of Evangelist or cult leader. They were sitting on a black leather sofa. The man was behind a desk and his office was big square and clean. I walked in on all of them debating. I recall thinking "perfect timing." At one point he spilled out a bunch of little papers onto his desk... We all moved in to look at them and I jumped up onto the desk. No one reacted, but I got right down and felt stupid I had done it.

-February 11, 1998

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Dream 068: Robot vs. Zombie

I was in a large house and I was in the Resident Evil dream mode again. This time, I had a remote control robot mini-soldier doing fighting for me. I also had a digital pet gun as my only other weapon.

I only remember fighting one zombie. I tried to keep the mini-robot between me and the zombie but it was difficult to get the hang of it. I ended up having to run down these stairs, turn, and shoot it with my pet gun.

-February 2, 1998

Dream 065-067: W.I.L.D. Driving

065: I was with Lia in a blue office. Looking through files and folders. We were researching something. I got the impression she very pretty although I don't remember her face at all.

066: This is the closest thing to a W.I.L.D. I've had so far. I was tossing and turning in bed with the Nova Dreamer on, trying to fall back to sleep. Next thing I know...

I was driving in my car down a country highway with three or four lanes of traffic. I was driving pretty fast, changing lanes a lot, passing other cars. There was a moderate amount of traffic for a country road. I was keeping a close watch for highway patrol. I clearly remember thinking "I have dreamed about this road before." Then I woke up.

067: I was in front of a corner store I stopped going to as a child. I was looking in the front window but they were closed down. The place looked old and abandoned. Like it had been closed for months. It was quite dark inside.

Note: This store was in my normal walking and bus route home for many years. That changed and I stopped going there, plus they took candy off what amounted to a decade long sale. The place has been occupied my entire life, until a few years back it was closed down for renovation.

This is the second time I recorded a dream about store alteration that did eventually occur, years later. The first was: Dream 037
(& see Lucid Animals at

-February 1, 1998

Dream 064: Spectral Tapeworm

I was in an unknown living room flat. Somewhat like my cousins house in Clear Lake. I was with my at first. She told me about this tapeworm.... It was burrowing through the sofa very quickly. It was kind of spectral and cartoon-like. Everything else was very realistic.

I noticed the TV had South Park on (I had never watched an episode at this time) it was very clear and vivid.

-January 31, 1998

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Dream 060-063: Endless Gum & Zombie Attack Turn Job Oppertunity

060: I was talking to my cousin Matthew and David (brothers/first cousins) and to Frances, who I called Emmit (Grandparents on their Fathers side). I was trying to illustrate a point to them but my mouth was filled with chewing gum and the words were too difficult to understand.

So I spit the gum out into a tissue but my mouth was still filled with gooey gum. I sat there in front of them pulling gum out of my mouth.

They all looked at me like I was disgusting.

061: I was dressed up nice at a dance class. I was there visiting someone. I knew Tiffany was in the class too. She kept checking me out, we liked each other. Tiffany looked wonderful in the dream.

062: I was locked up in this room with my kid sister. Resident evil style zombies were after us. I saw a cut shot of them breaking into the building where we were. They looked like computer graphics.

My sister and I were leaving the factory area without weapons. A guy in a blue compact convertible sports car pulled up on the street in front of us. He asked if I was an animator looking for work. I said yes, then took his card. His car was extremely messy. My sister and I started to walk home, but we lived together in the city that was slightly like New York. We were in front of our house and my sister changed into a brown straight haired, blue eyed girl.

The guy who gave me his card was setting up a feeble looking tin mailbox across the street from from us. The girl started to open the garage door with a key, I told her not to while that guy was around. She listened and we walked up the street.

Next thing I know, I was making coffee with a spoon that was filled with coffee. As I stirred, it filled the cup, and I was in my kitchen! Then I woke up.

Note: This is my first recorded dream with so many distinct transitions. I do not usually have, or at least, I do not usually remember this kind. Considering this occurred after a dry spell, is it likely I was having many dreams of this variety? Could constant transitioning make memory retrieval more elusive? Or was it just because I was growing tolerant to my dream recall and lucid induction techniques? Looking back on that time, nothing dramatic or special was going on in my life.

And, here again with the sports cars. I like sports cars. But, they are not a topic I have dwelt on much since I was about 12-years old. I have owned reliable cars since I was 16-years old. Apart from that, it's curious to me they figure so deeply and so frequently into my dreams.

Sports cars and cousins... But why?

063: I just recalled a fragment of a Star Trek dream. Captain Picard was aboard his own personal starship. There was a Klingon Star base that looked like organic technology. Something like a huge jellyfish. Warf gave the order to:

"Destroy Captain Picard if he gets within range."

-January 29, 1998

Monday, June 14, 2010

Dream 059: Stadium Parking Lot

My recall strength was low on this dream... I was at the Super Bowl with my parents. It was at night, I ended up wandering into the parking lot. The game ended. I remember thinking "Now I'll never find them." I think I was mad at them for some reason. I'm also pretty sure I met up with some guy in the parking lot of the stadium. I had never seen this stadium before.

Note: I don't watch football. My parents do a little, but I have never actually been to a sporting events with both of my parents.

-January 26, 1998

Dream 058: Extreme First Date

I was with Lia (girl I was talking to briefly but never became involved with) in some house. I remember us going into her room. We got naked and under the covers. I remember her tummy had a tattoo that surrounded her belly button. It was nice looking... Dark blue, almost black, and had a lacy tribal style.

I was extremely aroused, to the point that it was awkward. But I didn't have any intention of having sex with her "the first time" we were together. I could look up at a computer screen and see Lia's thoughts on display as text. They confirmed we both wanted the same thing. Her face was hazy, not as pretty as real life. Kind of dull and average. I never really felt turned on, instead I felt nervous. But she was full of desire and passion.

Note: Here again I refer to the number of times I had been with a girl. This is comparable to the typical dating mentality of waking life. First date, second date, third date appropriate behaviors and activities. This was accurate, we hadn't gone on a date. And, I doubt I had dreamed about her before this because I had only recently met her.

-January 25, 1998

Dream 057: A Dreamless Week

Now I'm pissed! I haven't recalled a dream in a week! What happened!? I must have vivid dreams right now!

057: I vaguely recall telling my Mom in a dream Stacy had already gone back to Tim, or words to that effect. I also had flash backs of dream visions, but none I clearly recall anymore.

Note: I continued all my induction techniques for this entire week. And, I used the Nova Dreamer, and honestly didn't recall even one dream. I have notes for almost each day, but no dreams. Not sure what brought this on, but things had been running smoothly until this point. I will look into if anything special happened that week.

-January 24, 1997

Dream 056: The Artemis System Net

Although I don't remember any visual dreams, I was awaken in the middle of a nap dreaming. I rambled something off like "I was just thinking about the Artemis Net." From the game Master of Orion II - which I played for hours today.

Note: I almost never use this defensive technology in the game. Basically, it's a network of mines that blockade ships from attacking your worlds.

-January 17, 1998

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Dream 052-055: One Timeless Dance & Multiple Reality Buttons

052: I was at my High School dance. It was not in a building I recognized. I don't even recall seeing anyone's face. I was sitting on some silver bars (jungle gym/monkey bars) talking to a girl. She asked me something about dancing. I was wearing a white collared shirt, similar to one I wore at my Junior High graduation! A song came on that everyone wanted to dance to it. It was Grease Lightning!

053: I was trying to press the reality tester button on the Nova Dreamer. But, there was several of them and none of them worked at all. I dismissed it as just me trying to press the circuits and "missing the button."

054: This dream had a beginning, middle, and end. All I recall of it now is the very beginning and the very end. Stacy and I were in S.F. in her car. She drove there and we parked... Near the end of the dream we found the car, nearby Tom (one of my best friends first cousins!) was there. I thanked him (?) and gave him a firm handshake.

Note: Yet again, a person I have had little contact with in life appears in my dreams. And yet again, a cousin is featured in my dreams.

055: I had graphic sexual dream about my Ex Stacy where we did "almost everything" but she was on her period. I never looked her in the eyes, and it was day time. This maybe connected with the last dream, part of it, or a separate dream.

-January 16, 1998

Dream 051: Don't Use the Stairs

I walked out of my room, and blocking the stairs was a huge spiderweb. With a giant red furry spider. It moved around a bit on the web the moment I noticed it, and that spooked me into waking up...

-January 15, 1998

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Dream 048-050: Twisted Stairway & A Lesson in Respect

048: I was on Alabama St. in my Mom's car. It was raining and I got the impression I was home sitting for my cousin. I parked the car directly out front. I left the car running, locked all the doors, and then took the keys out of ignition. (Impossible.) The stairs out front were completely different than real-life. Cement and metal twisting upwards to the front door.

As I climbed up the stairs, my wallet fell down my pant leg. (Impossible.) I thought, "I should ask myself if I'm dreaming because it seems awfully difficult to climb these stairs!"

049: I was in some huge warehouse. There were racks of clothing everywhere. One or more people were trying to sneak up on me. I don't recall any more about it.

Auntie Bertha and Uncle Frank were coming up the stairs of what I thought was my house. I said "Hi" to both of them, and my Auntie Bertha didn't respond. So I raised my voice and said "Hello Auntie Bertha!" She just gave me this look.

I followed her into the bathroom and was like "What's your problem?" She then gave me a brief speech about respect. I gave her a military salute and walked out.

-January 14, 1998

Dream 044-047: Imploding Sun & Another Map Dream

044: I was in my room, except it was located where my Jr. High school gym and cafeteria are. I remember a car turning the corner there and the headlights flashing me across the eyes. (I was not wearing the Nova Dreamer this night.) My room had two windows. There was more to this dream...

045: All my relatives were upstairs. And we were group clapping and arguing. And speaking our minds about each other.

046: I was in outer space, I didn't feel like I was inside a spaceship or a body. I was staring at a yellow star that nearly filled up my field of view. It looked a little time-lapse fake - it started to implode. As the star caves-in on itself, I turn and fly away as fast as possible, which I believe, leads directly into my next dream...

047: I saw an overhead map of an earth-like planet. I chose where to settle on it. Once I had chosen a river filled area, I appeared in the world within sight of the settlement I saw from above. I swooped around the settlement and the visuals got really fake and hypnagogic. Then I woke up.

-January 11, 1998

Dream 041-043: A Dream Series Begins & A Movie I Never Want to See

041: I was talking to the girl across the street on my house phone. I could see in through the window in the front of her house. It was massive inside. Oak wood floors, panels, with a high vaulted ceiling. It was about 3-stories high. I remember her saying "Well should I go over to your house or do you want to come over to mine?"

That's when I walked into her garage. (Still on the cordless house phone.) A small guy was stacking blocks of wood there. I could look out of the garage and see the front of my house with the garage door open. I thought "This is like the second time I've talked to this girl, we should be getting close soon."

The other time I was thinking of was in a dream too. (Dream 014)

Note: This was "like the 2nd" dream I had about the house across the street. It was in fact the 2nd dream I recorded about being friends with them. It was around this time in real life that new neighbors moved into the house across the street. I had been friendly with the original people who lived there, but when I was a kid. Our relationship had faded out many years before they actually moved out.

The new reoccurring relationships/location became pivotal in my glimpses of repressed dream history.

042: I was at my Dad's old apartment. Waiting for him and Tracy (estranged stepmother) to show up. The front door opened slowly and my Dad walked in. After a beat my Mom walked in next. She fussed over what to wear while Tracy is here. Then ran off to the bathroom to change.

043: My third dream just came back to me! It was a movie preview. Robert De Nero is the only person I recall. He was talking to a woman on the phone. He was naked in bed on the phone masturbating. I thought "This is a pretty gross looking movie."

Note: This brings up a point that often occurs to me. Are we more likely to forget dreams we consider gross or annoying?

-January 9, 1998

Saturday, May 29, 2010

Dream 040: For Statistical Purposes

My intention is to transfer 20-Dreams per month to this blog. For statistical purposes, you should recon Dream 025 as two separate dreams to arrive at 20-Dreams in May. In retrospect, the vivid fearful dreams might have stimulated lucidity. Or perhaps a sign of increasing lucidity?

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Dream 038-039: Gun Play & Failed Reality Test

038: I had a handgun, black. I was walking around (a house) and pointing it a lot (like a cop movie). I searched through some closet/cubby hole, but found nothing. Then felt cautious enough to point the gun into the closet. I recall thinking "That was a lame thing for me to do."

Why that one moment is the only part I recall is bizarre to me. It wasn't the most eventful, interesting, challenging, or scenic. If anything it was one of the least interesting moments, and not the last moment at that. I'm sure the dream went on for at least a minute longer.

Note: On the surface a throw away dream, but I still remember it to this day. I vaguely recollect finding a woman in a rocking chair in a living room area next. This brief fragment has the air of one of my nightmares in the resolution phase.

039: At one time last night, or two, I dreamed that the reality tester button on the Nova Dreamer had fallen out of the mask!

Note: Dream 039 is the first to include a possible false awakening. Only, I never remembered waking up, only dreaming that the button had fallen out. It reminds me of dreams in which I found cash. When I woke up, I briefly looked around realizing of course, it was all a dream.

-January 8, 1998

Monday, May 3, 2010

Dream 034-037: Deep into Dream City

034: (Dream Seed) at last! I'm sure I dreamed about high school. The parking lot was filled with dark cars. I even thought at one point "Maybe I should just do 5-years of high school?"

It may have been around graduation time. I don't really remember seeing any familiar people from school. I sorta remember a student being lynched in the parking lot.

I was talking to Emily. She was sitting at a (desktop) computer outdoors! She had makeup on and looked very Gothic. It looked like she was browsing through menus (online). I was sitting on the ground. She seemed slightly sad.

036: I was in a bar/pub by myself. The place was crowded. I waded through the crowd towards the bar at its center. Steff and another tall blond guy were asking a girl - who looked like a more attractive version of Holly! (A girl who was my best friend for a short period of 3rd grade, and who by coincidence transferred to my high school. We were never friends after a fallout we had in the 3rd grade however. I was floored she was in any dream or thought whatsoever...) "How much for a blow job?"

Just then, I walked up to Steff and greeted him and his friend. He seemed mildly surprised to see me and mildly happy. The bar/pub was in a made up city that was a cross between Downtown SF and Brighton England (where my friend Steff was from). I've dreamed about it before.

Much later in the dream, I was thrown in prison. A dirty, filthy, farm animal hangout/barn-like place. I looked around a bit, then other prisoners appeared. One of the prisoners appeared to be the lynched student from earlier(!), covered with scars and scabs all over him. The guards that appeared were releasing him. I recall thinking at that point: "I only have to make it 30-days in here. Then they'll let me go like him..."

Note: I have never been arrested, or sent to prison. I have no interest in prison stories, fictional or otherwise. No abnormal fear or dread of prison, and no contact with anyone who has been to prison.

My second record of a familiar dream city. Downtown San Fransisco mixed with Brighton. This is likely part of the same location visited in Dream 031

037: I just recalled another dream fragment. I get the feeling I was at Tanforan shopping mall. But there were tables setup on the second floor near the escalators. I was walking by myself. I spotted Fey (ex-girlfriend I had contact with a few years prior to this dream and had rarely thought of since), she spotted me. She was sitting with another woman, a brunette.

She smiled from afar, I smiled back and she had a look like "Oh see, I got that man! He wants me." I felt slightly uncomfortable with her expression. I didn't stop to talk to her. Her look didn't change either. She just looked at her friend (with the same expression). She was overweight. Pear shaped. I didn't feel sexual attraction towards her (like usual).

Note: There were no tables set up by the 2nd floor escalators at Tanforan in those days. There are a few there now, and an Orange Julius/Dairy Queen also. Also see Dream 067 & Lucid Animals at

-January 7, 1998

Dream 032-033: Vaction with Estranged Friends

032: I recall being at a cabin with Katie, Fred, Molly, and Emily. I know there was some cool drama in the attic during this dream but I don't recall any of that in detail. I do distinctly recall us all getting ready to go. Getting our stuff packed.

The house was two stories with a yellow painted interior. I remember walking down the stairs, flirting with Molly, and grabbing Emily's hand.

Note: My Mother and I used to go on vacation with them to a house near the Russian River. It had been over 5-years since we had vacationed together. Katie was my Mom's close friend since childhood. Why she appears so often in these records is mind boggling for me. There is no apparent reason for it, that I am aware of, whatsoever.

On the other hand, they had the only attic I entered as a child and still clearly recollect today.

I have probably had dreams about their attic since before I was 10-years old. Nothing of great interest ever occurred there in real life. Molly and I use to play there once in a while. In "dreamland" I strongly suspect it's a location of olden suppressed dream experiences. Although I only consciously remember glimpses of it.

I vaguely recall meeting up with Daric in a dream. He was sleeping close to a digital alarm clock.

Note: Daric and Joe were my best friends, and a regular part of my daily life at the time of this writing. Both lived close by in the same city. Yet, this is the first time Daric appears in the dream records, and Joe appears as sort of an extra in only two dreams before this.

Sleeping next to a digital alarm clock is exactly what I was doing throughout many of these experiments and records.

-January 6, 1998

Dream 031: Drop Zone Hotel

I was in San Francisco, or an area like it. I was walking uphill with a person I don't remember. When I looked out over the view of the city, I saw a 50-story building. Like a hotel under construction, it had scaffolds all-around it.

It was white and rundown looking. I had the thought, "That looks like the building I keep falling off of in my dreams." -There was a lot more to this dream that I don't remember clearly.

Note: The first mention of my alternate dream memory-bank. Something that happened in an earlier dream. I hadn't written about falling off this building before. Yet when I woke up, the location felt familiar, as it still does to this day.

-January 1, 1998

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Dream 029-030: Friend of a Hottie, Audio Only Dream

029: I was sitting on a sofa with my pockets empty and inside out. I was talking about Nicole's sister with an unknown person. Whoever I was talking with seemed to know Nicole. I was sitting in a living room I did not recognize.

Note: Nicole is a girl I had a brief crush on when she showed up senior year of high school as the blossomed ugly duckling. I had not thought about her in years, we never exchanged numbers, and I do not know if she had a sister or not.

I do not remember anything visual about this dream. I remember someone talking about a storm coming and that Katie and Fred were playing Battleship.

Note: Boardgames are something I think to play during blackouts. Blackouts tend to occur during storms. An odd implication in my first recorded "audio only" dream.

-December 30, 1997

Dream 028: Colorful Condoms

I was in someones apartment. I was video tapping something (on their equipment). Soon one or two women showed up. One of them went down on me right near the balcony. The curtains were wide open. Her entire apartment complex could see what we were doing.

I started to make love to her, a blond with an attractive body. She told me "Put a condom on." I went through a couple of nearby boxes and found some very colorful condoms.

-December 27, 1997

Note: I think it's possible my recent increase in dream lovers was weighing on my conscious... Ironically, finding the colorful condoms ended the dream.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Dream 026-027: World Command Center (Lucid #3), Nightclub Bust

026: (Lucid #3) I was in a control room, or the command center of the entire world. I could look down at it like a map from a video game. I could physically fly from place-to-place. Little orange dots marked the cities.

At some point the Borg (Star Trek's galactic villains) got involved. I would fly from place-to-place talking with people. I realized at one point, this is a dream! I looked around to see if people were still behaving as if it were real. And they were, so I went about the business of saving the world.

The lands and the sea looked like tropical islands. At one point I could see great quantities of pollution filling the air, rising in the atmosphere swishing and swirling into the perfect air.

I went to where my Dad was and family was gathering. I put on a silk shirt I felt like I had left at Grandma's house (at Christmas). I told my Dad that it was too much work to save the world from assimilation. And that I was just going to let it be taken over. My Dad wanted me to save it of course. I remember watching time lapse of water rushing into San Francisco, eroding away the layers of rock and land at its foundation.

Note: One of the most epic and memorable dreams of my life. I do not remember ever directly performing any deeds to "save the world." I don't remember fighting the Borg directly. I only remember flying around to "crisis zones" and talking with people there.

The most enterprising element to the dream was being able to seamlessly interact with the world map. I still remember the spectacular vistas while flying. Flight speed and control were perfect, easy, and extremely rapid.

I most likely flew away from encounters with the Borg. I vaguely recall seeing them set down on one of the smaller islands in the ocean. I landed on a nearby island to speak with a native there about it. I was absolutely thrilled by the sense of speed, scope, and casual power in this dream. It lasted at least 10-15 minutes.

027: I was at a dance or nightclub. I was hanging out with the Joe and this Hispanic thug dude. I was walking around the place, music playing that was maybe my alarm clock. Then the guy I was hanging out with said "Oh shit the cops are here!"

I looked around for them and saw them standing way off to one side.

I decided the best way for me to avoid getting involved was to go dance on the dance floor. So I went downstairs to the sunken dance floor or gym. The women were wearing white skirts with white stockings. The men were in black. I started to shuffle to go into a break dancing move(!) when the real life phone woke me up.

Note: This was borderline a dream seed. I kept inching closer towards the objective of "traveling back in time" to high school. Tropical islands were another dream seed location I had difficulty with.

-December 26, 1997

Dream 025: Falling and Voices

(Nightmare) It took me over an hour to fall asleep. I only slept for six hours. Lots of hypnagogic imagery. And (A) the startling voice of Stacy saying my name. In the imagery we were in my car - just before I fell asleep.

The night before, (B) I suddenly felt myself falling off a second story balcony. It was so shocking, my heart started pounding extremely hard. I woke up shaking.

Note: This is the first entry in which I was struck by fear. I didn't consider this entry to be a "true dream" at the time. Yet here again are those familiar dream elements, condensed into a few short sentences. I am familiar with hypnagogic imagery but rarely experience it vividly.

-December 20, 1997

Dream 024: Harmless Candle

The only fragment I remember is being in my living room at night. And a candle was burning on the floor near the front window. The flame was almost touching the curtains and I thought:

"Oh no it's going to catch on fire!" But it didn't, just kept burning. Then I woke up.

-December 19, 1997

Dream 023: Gotta Run!

The only fragment I remember clearly - I was in a bedroom, possibly my grandfather's, there was a woman I was threatening. As it turned out she threatened me, she stepped out from behind the bed and revealed she was carrying a shotgun. My tune changed when I saw it. I thought:

"Oh shit I was bluffing and now I'm in trouble. Gotta run!"

-December 17, 1997

Dream 021-22: Mob Milkshakes & Cigarette Smoke

021: I had many vivid dreams, many! I remember only bits and pieces. I remember this strange mob guy and these strange milkshakes he made. I'm pretty sure Fred (& Katie) were in my dream, if not the entire family. I remember being in a (very) high place. I remember a huge place, cylinder shaped with spiraling balconies.

There may have been a high school mock up in the dreams as well. I don't remember ever being lucid. High school is one of the dream locations I was dream seeding to travel to.

I'm with my Dad. I was working in the computer room. He was smoking a cigarette near to the butt of it. I said "Dad you aren't supposed to smoke in here?" He practically ignored me then finished what little of the cigarette he had left.

-December 15, 1997

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Dream 020: Dream Corridor (Lucid #2)

(Lucid #2) I just remembered my dream, a lucid one! I was moving down this passage way, there was a person at the end of hall. There was a baby blue door (on the right). I remember thinking "Another lucid dream!"

Everything was superbly detailed visually. I remember trying to run down the hallway towards the person. That if I moved in such a way so that I didn't see my hands, I would run even faster!

Sadly, I don't remember who the person was at the end of the hall for sure. I questioned him about the dream, he answered clearly and straightforward. I was excited, it was very realistic. I kept thinking something was about to happen at any moment. But always reminded myself it was a dream, it will only happen if I let it.

Note: This might be the first "dream guru" I recorded. I had over the years met people in my dreams who themselves seemed lucid. They professed to be aware they were dream people and that I was dreaming. Occasionally they explained the cosmology of my dreamland to me. Sometimes they made sense, other times they didn't. There are also the nonsense explanations - that made sense while dreaming but not on awakening. Either way, I rarely remember their words it would seem.

-December 14, 1997

Dream 019: Walk of Shame

I invited Stacy over, she walked in the front door with a living room full with people.

-December 12, 1997

Note: Seemingly a throwaway dream but in this brief entry are several reoccurring dream elements.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Dream 015-018: Supermarket Mom's, Demon Presence

015: I think I was in some strange supermarket. There were all these women of different ages around, each of them trying to mother me. I finally told an aisle full of them "I'm only here for two weeks, if each of you tries to baby me twice I won't have any time left." They laughed and acted somewhat embarrassed.

Note: Another occasion with a mass of unknown females in a large area.

016: (Nightmare) I drove up to a house with three other people. We were not there very long when a strange powerful presence manifested. It was like the classic depiction of a demon appearance, I ran the opposite way. My friends followed me and became Jason and Alex (his close friend). I jumped out a two-story window and tried to reach the roof of the shed in the backyard. I missed, but glided off to one side and landed softly on grass next to the shed.

I went back inside to look for my friends and they were gone. I couldn't find the invisible force any more, but the house was in the same condition. Soon the phone rang and at this point the dream seemed more like a movie I was watching on TV. I saw a woman answer. She spoke for a moment then became alarmed "I didn't call you a cunt!" She said. Then she became fear struck and ripped the phone out of the wall. She can still hear a voice on the other end.

I changed the channel not wanting to encounter "demon trickery" movies. I heard a car pull up outside. I left the bathroom - where the TV was - and went to the front door. Two vans had pulled up with my cousins inside. DD, Emily, Dale's daughter and her sister's daughter's - were getting out of them. It was nighttime.

My Mom called at the front door, then the dream ended.

Note: The profanity in this dream, the "c" word, is not a word I use or think about. It's commonly used in the UK I know, but I have never made use of it in conversation in my life.

017: A silver sports car pulled into the backyard (my backyard), my Dad and the guy that looked like David's best friend got out (a person I only met in passing and don't even remember now). I was watching through a slot in the blinds. I started complaining to my Mom... "Don't let them screw with the computer."

018: While driving, I remembered a driving dream from last night. I was in my car on the freeway. I saw a police car, its marking were grayish. No sooner did I see it than I swerved off the road and then adjusted back onto the road. I remember thinking "Oh great, I hope he didn't see that."

-December 10, 1997

Dream 014: Love Triangle

I'm in the backseat of a car on Stacy's (most recent ex-girlfriend) right, Tim (Stacy's Ex-Boyfriend) is at her left, Lilly (Stacy's sister) and a few others are in the back. It was bizarre, I told everyone I didn't want to fight him. But then I demonstrated my ability to destroy him with my bare hands. By pretending to rip him to shreds. That almost caused a fight on the spot.

I explain to Tim how Stacy has hurt me, she'll do the same to you again. He starts to cry. I get out of the car and walk away. I expect and I'm looking for Stacy's shadow to follow behind me. It does, she walks me back to this bizarre apartment I'm staying in with my Mom and Katie. Neither of them are home. On the way Stacy explains the main reason she is still with me is: "Sex!"

I find a note in the bathroom (there) that says "July" and has a phone number which I interpret to be the phone number to Six Flags. Stacy insists we draw all the blinds, we did. Soon I was leaving and going home (to my real life home).

Out front it's raining and I'm still with Stacy. We go in to the garage, I'm picking up the mail when the girl across the street appears in front of Stacy. I walk over to see what they're talking about, Stacy directs her towards me. I walk up to her and she says:

"My brother and I want to be friends with you."
We agree, she walks away, Stacy is surprised and says "I leave your life and right away a friend replaces me."
I reply "See how God treats me?"

Note: This was apparently the starting point of a dream friendship with my neighbors from across the street. Since then, I have recollections of other dreams with them in it. In real life, we are barely on a first name basis. I have no special interest in them, or they me, just friendly waves and every few years a polite chat.

-December 4, 1997

Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Dream 012-013: X-Ray Vision & Roadside Sex

012: I remember clearly I was at a gas station filling my car up with gas. I decided to look down into the tank and watch the gas go in, a physical impossibility. The tank must have went down into darkness over 100ft. I could see the gas level getting higher and higher, until it almost overflowed.

013: Some way or another I was at this strange house I don't know the exact order of events. People were after me. At one point I asked Molly, the girl I was with (estranged childhood best friend), to open the closet door while I readied a shotgun. Sure enough when she opened it a white trash looking guy with a rifle jumped out. My gun jammed, but eventually I shot him.

Katie and Fred (Molly's real life parents) showed up shortly thereafter and told me not to worry about Molly's boyfriend, that she "still had feelings for me." Soon thereafter we hit the road which was loaded with a mob of women who may have been working for the "bad guys." The road was like Skyline, long and narrow, and just women. Most everybody walked only, I didn't see any cars. I pulled one of them off to the side, not Molly, and we made out. I was running to the north, the girl I basically had sex with on the side of the road I didn't know.

Note: Dream 0012-013 are examples of being semi-lucid. Looking back, it would seem I had made an enterprise out of running down athletic women and fooling around with them. I never noticed the connection between Dream 009 and Dream 013 until now. A road filled with alluring women might have required a deep gas tank? Also see Dream 015.

-December 1, 1997

Dream 011: Unwelcome Guests & Epic Festive Party

I was walking down my block towards the cross street, when a car with two girls stopped honked, and flirted with me from an old Camaro. The girls were overweight, the Camero was thrashed, I spent a few seconds checking them out to see if they were worthwhile. I turned away, they honked again, I held out my hand and waved. Then they drove off.

There were many people on my block, in fact a neighbor brought me a half a watermelon that was sort of shredded. There was also a repair man waiting at my front door. They all tried to walk-in when I got home, I told them to wait out front. I searched the house for my Mom and Grandfather I couldn't find them at first. I vividly remember walking upstairs, my Mom's door was shut, my Grandpa's door was open but I didn't see him inside. I thought there should be a message from my Mom about "the status of the household." I had two voice messages so I checked them. I don't remember the messages.

Next I hear my Grandfather coming home. I go to the front door to greet him - all the people waiting at the front walked into the (entry) hall. I sneered at them to leave and I walked out onto the porch. A very hostile and an upset repair man said "I'm not going to argue with you any more."

I went back inside and it sort of became a Christmas party. A very decorative and epic one. My living room was about twice its ordinary size. There was a grand table with many people sitting at. My Grandfather was at the center. My Auntie Bertha was at the end, my Mom was absent but I looked for a chair space for her. There was one next to my Grandfather's right, with a tall Christmas tree in her place.

I remember thinking - my Mom must have went to the party without me - a party that was happening in real life. The living room was beautifully made up with gold and silver and the ceiling must have been 30ft high. It was very elegant.

-November 29, 1997

Monday, April 26, 2010

Dream 008-010: Gatorade Behavior Control, Lucid #1, Old Best Friend

008: My first dream I was with a girl. We walked around in the woods. There were strange creatures. One of them was snake like and approached us from on the trail we were on. Another struck me as a chameleon gnome that looked like gray wood and bark with glowing eyes. We talked a lot and were not afraid. I don't remember what she looked like. We eventually traveled to an empty house, not much happened there but I do remember trying to jump into a moving car, a Mustang convertible (with the top down).

When we reached her house her Dad was there with a frozen body in the living room. Her Mom was there too! They told me their daughter "knew too much" and that "Gatorade" a "behavior controlling organization" would want to go after her. I was not lucid, I can't remember much more.

Note: This dream is one I would have remembered parts of for life. I also remember "Gatorade" arriving in a white van. The "frozen body" in my recollection was in the kitchen/dining room area standing upright encased in ice. If its presence was explained, I don't remember the explanation. This dream was unusually vivid, and at least the gnome like creature was inspired by something I had just then seen on TV. This dream was not scary in-spite of the excitement and the monsters. On the contrary, it was tranquil and mysterious.

009: (Lucid #1) My second dream I was running down the street at car like speeds when I realized, this must be dream. I looked around at the houses that looked like Berry St, I thought to myself: maybe it's a dream - I should open up one of those houses doors and check inside. I also thought, since this is a dream I should try to look for the Nova dreamer lights. I found a car driving in front of me with its brake lights flashing. Next, I ran up alongside of a woman that was jogging. I started to flirt with her. She looked at me like "your up to something but I kind of like it."

Note: In the journal, I left out that I did in fact enter a random house on Berry St. I ran up to the front door, it was unlocked, I looked around. No one was home but it appeared to be well furnished inside. It was poorly light, so I ran back out to the street. Just then, the attractive looking female jogged past heading in the same direction I initially was. She had on a hat, her hair was up, and she was wearing a black or navy blue sports outfit with a white stripe.

010: Third dream I just remembered. I was on the phone (with ???) and I got a call on the other line, it was Jason (my childhood best friend). I paced around my room and talked to him. I thought about inviting him to play games, but I was scared I would "never get rid of him" if I did. He sounded a little hazy and weird, which is normal for him now.

-November 28, 1997

Dream 005-007: Dream Crime, No Touching, Dinosaurs

005: One of my dreams last night I vaguely remember standing in front of a jewelry store with other people I didn't know. I may have done something illegal to them. I remember sneaking home alone afterward, except I lived in this bizarre three-story (wooden) plank shack. I sneaked into my room but the landlord - an older lady about age 60 - freaked out and threatened, through the wall, to call the police. My room was a super mess, worse than in real life. I thought to myself "If she calls the police on me I'm going to get caught" -for whatever (illegal) I did earlier.

So I sneaked all around the building (and through the backyard) until I could hear her voice talking on the phone through the wall. I climbed or flew up to her window and insisted to her that everything was OK, and there was no need to call the police. It seemed to be nighttime in the dream.

Note: Throughout the time I was looking around my disaster area of an apartment, I could hear the land lady screaming at me through the walls. The walls were visibly vibrating. I could hear her voice laying in threats at me. I remember my stuff looked really old, like 1950's electronics junk. Dusty and possibly nonfunctional. From the outside, this bizarre rundown apartment was very similar to the house in Dream 016. In both dreams I ended up in a familiar backyard location that doesn't exist in real life.

This was a borderline nightmare.

006: I had two other dreams I remember. I was standing in my kitchen with Crissy(?), it seemed like we were an item. I touched her or tried to kiss her and she looked at me funny. I thought to myself, oh no I shouldn't have touched her. Maybe she just likes me as a friend? But (instead) I said something like "That's just the way it is."

007: I know there was more to my third dream, all I remember is running through the park at night. Joe may have been present. There were creatures in the park, which resembled Cherry Park, but it was dark and I couldn't see anything but grass and trees. I said to whomever I was with "If we run inside the tree canopy, the dinosaurs won't be able to get us."

-November 25, 1997

Dream 003-004: Snowy Mountains & Estranged Cousins

003: One of the dreams last night was, I think I was alone. At first it seemed like San Bruno, I was walking up the hill towards Skyline. Only I kept going up and up all the way to snow covered mountains, which I spent time exploring... the top of the mountains were very real, vivid, and the view was breathtaking. There were no buildings or signs of other people, just snow covered rocky mountains with a main peak. I was near the top of a vast horizon and cloudless blue noonday sky. I don't remember seeing the sun.

004: I also had a dream about my cousin David walking into my computer room. I was showing him something on the screen when I became angry with him for not speaking with me for years. I told him off, walked downstairs with him where Marc was and I told him off too. The only part I remember verbatim was "You always thought you were better than me!"

The three of us were talking in the hall near the front door, they both seemed offended, ashamed, and looked at me like I was crazy for confronting them.

-November 24, 1997

Dream 002: Dark Winter

Crows/penguins fly in all-around (me), I think I was going to fight them. There was a (black) leafless tree and snow on the ground. It was pretty, dark, and dreary.

-November 23, 1997

Note: I still remember the contrast between the black swarming mass of sinister birds, and the white snowy ground all around. Later in this dream I remember hiding in a crawlspace or attic. I was inside a home with a pointed roof, very near by the area I first saw the swarm of black birds. This dream felt like the dead of winter, in the dead of night.

Dream 001: Water Bed Making Out

Rin (high school ex-girlfriend) and I were naked (on a water bed) touching and feeling each other - but without having sex. It didn't seem like my room and I didn't realize that it was a dream. The bedroom reminded me of Katie & Fred's old house (estranged family friends). I remember it felt good for both of us, and that I never looked at her face. Her body was a lot more attractive in the dream than in real life.

-November 22, 1997

Intro 000: Dreams & Nightmares

The first set of posts are dreams and nightmares I recorded while experimenting with lucid dreaming and dream seeding 1997-2001. During this period I frequently used the Nova Dreamer and attempted various dream recall techniques. These dreams were usually recorded the instant I woke by hand or as soon as the dreams were recalled. I copied them into this blog with minor corrections.

Much of the dream imagery leaps back into my memory when I explore these old journal entries, but extra words will be in brackets or mentioned post script. There is some sexual content. I may tone down dreams that are too graphic. I have changed the names of certain people and places out of respect of privacy.

I share these with the sincere hope that they will further advance the human understanding of our extremely important dream lives. The unbounded but murky world we dwell in and fabricate while we are asleep. I wish I could say I am good at remembering my dreams. Without regular practice and plenty of sleep, I rarely do. The dreams uncovered here are often shades of sagas, eras, episodes, and bygone relationships with "real people" with "dream people" and in "dream places" that stretch back to childhood.

As my lucid experiments progressed. I learned imperfectly to: See through walls, run at car-like speed, fly, leap from great heights without fear, have sex, slip through cracks, teleport -and a few other things more surprising.

Strangely, many of the cast members of my dreams are real people - long since left my life. When I began to recollect large numbers of dreams, I was often stunned by their constant appearances - when I woke up. While awake, I hadn't much thought of some of these people in years.

Gradually, a warped parallel dream reality emerged. One in which people I had written off long before without regret, were often my regular if awkward dream companions. Even more bewildering? While dreaming certain dreams, I was apparently familiar with the lore, history, timeline, social structure, and even the geography of my dreamland. In these same dreams, I felt completely aware of the differences between "real life" and "dream life."

During my fleeting moments of super-lucidity, I seemed to command an exact memory of scores of additional dreams I remembered little about while awake. This catalog of offline dream knowledge felt crucial for my comfort and survival vs. certain reoccurring dream hazards. Upon awakening, the wisdom of my dreamland all but evaporates.

Considering some of the content I discovered, I don't think remembering 100% of our dreams would be healthy for some. For me, this dream life experience amounts to a staggering and prolific subconscious lore.

Until this experiment, I was unaware that many of my dreams were not so forgotten. But instead stored just beneath the surface of my conscious memories. I have learned that we are all able and all required to - access our subconscious dream histories. This is our own personal Map of Dreamland.

These are my private journals and highly valued personal records. All Rights Reserved. ©1997-2010

No part of this publication may be stored, transmitted, or copied without expressed written permission. Brief quotes are okay for review and reference as long the URL is sited:

No religious or mystical rituals were employed. Advertisements that appear are not necessarily endorsed, there is a lot of dream junk online. My dream explorations were thrown into high gear thanks to information and technology from the Lucidity Institute:

Dream Recall
Inducing Lucid Dreams
Nova Dreamer